You already know your pal, “God” AKA Yahweh AKA “The Good Lord Above” AKA “Santa Claus’ Secret Santa” (ok I made that one up). He’s the Big Man Upstairs and on Facebook and he’s always there to listen to your problems, share some memes, and take care of the gentle humans who lovingly follow him. Sometimes, however, angry humans curse the name of “God” and sometimes he curses them back (God is only human, after all). Other times he engages with them to try to get them to shed their “evil ways” and stop flaming him on his own Facebook page. This is one of the times “God” converted a “non-believer” into a credulous believer and it’s too funny to miss.
Once, a woman tried to troll God on Facebook (using some very nasty language, I might add):
But rather than go all “Old Testament” on her, he decided to take her to Sunday School:
But she wasn’t done, she decided to ask him for a little dating advice (who better than the dude who hates fornication?):
That just goes to show you, don’t f*ck with God or he will read you like an illustrated children’s bible! God doesn’t come to play, so leave the games at home. But if you’re feeling down and out, depressed, or otherwise troubled, go ahead and drop him a line. Maybe he’ll respond or maybe he’s on vacation. (God has a busy job and he needs rest too, folks!)